Monday, January 5, 2009

To sleep, perchance to dream......

Or just simply to sleep. I miss sleeping. I miss sleeping and waking up ALL ON MY OWN. Not to a crying, hungry baby or a little boy who is trying to crawl into my bed for the third time that night. I am sleep deprived to the point that I left the wrong home phone number on my VTing companion's answering machine. Sigh. I'd be such a great mommy if I could just sleep for longer than 3 hours at a time. And I'd probably care what my hair looks like and how messy my house is.... Launey said today that I needed to update my blog. Frankly all I care about lately is the next time I can lay down and rest for a bit. From the minute I get up I'm looking forward to bedtime. Since this is my life right now-this is what I'm choosing to blog about.
Caitlyn has been moving backwards in her sleeping habits and has been nursing every 3 hrs with the occasional 4 hour stint. What the heck is that all about. Well-she's getting over a cold, often has bright red teething cheeks, has had absolutely NO real schedule to speak of during the past 2 weeks, and is probably on a growth spurt. Any advice on how to get a nursing baby to sleep through the night with all of that thrown into the mix? I'm always playing the what if game in my head when she's crying in her room. What if she's got the blanket over her head? What if she's poopy/wet/starving/too hot/too cold/too tired/not tired enough?????? If only babies could talk this whole situation would be dramatically improved.
She just woke up again and is crying right now. Argh. Passed off to daddy only to have the crying continue. Then I went into our room and Josh is passed out under the covers. Why am I the only one in this family that wants to sleep in my own bed?
Sorry this isn't very entertaining or enlightening but frankly I'm too tired to care about that either. Oh and did I mention that Caitlyn has a piercing scream. Like if the neighbours could hear her I'm sure they'd think I was beating her repeatedly. So I try to let her self soothe in the night only to hear the scream. Which if allowed to contines, wakes everyone up. So I pick her up and nurse her out of self preservation. And the cycle continues.
I think when I'm old I'll move in with her and scream randomly through the night. See-these are the evil mommy thoughts that go through my head when I'm tired. Okay-enough venting. Comment away.

9 comments:

Mrs. M said...

These are hard times. Can you sneak a nap anywhere? It gets better, eventually, although I confess that we still have boys sneaking into our bed... I'm sure it will stop before they hit dating and driving age:)

Lynn said...

Oh yes.....definitely hard days for sure. I agree with Mrs. M. Just keep thinking that it will get better....cause it does. Then it's onto other things....like you know....teenage issues. THAT's when you will get the joy out of screaming BACK at them. LOL! Just kidding. I know....not funny. At least not just yet. Hang in there! Just know that we know how YOU feel. Yup.

Alison said...

Ahhh, hon - give it time. Soon enough she will be screaming exactly what she thinks :) Slamming doors, throwing things, stomping around, you know, that kind of thing. But seriously hon, you are doing a great job. You'll all survive, and sleep will return someday :)

Brad Herkimer said...

Hannah was like that.... still is. She's finally getting better at staying asleep all night, but she's 5. Maybe try giving Caitlyn a bottle of formula before bed. It might stay with her longer, then when she does wake up you'll have more milk. Just a thought. My milk was like water with Hannah. I think that was half the problem. Hang in there!!! She'll be screaming because she wants to wear make up in no time!!!!! xoxo

candice said...

Is Caitlyn a good napper? Could you sleep when she does? Eden is almost two and still wakes up repeatedly at night wanting to be snuggled. I don't do the crying it out thing, so the way i have coped is putting her in bed with us--sometimes i get more sleep that way and sometimes it backfires on me and i am up all night watching neal and eden doze away. Those nights are frustrating and i swear in my sleep deprivation that things will change and that maybe crying it out isn't so bad, but then in the morning when i am feeling a little better or after a nap, all that resentment is usually forgotten until it happens again :) for the most part, i think my body has adjusted to the wacky schedule i've had the last year and a half and even when E does sleep through the night (on those rare occasions) i still wake up!! that is truly irritating, but o'well, i think i've just accepted it as part of being a mom. i know that doesn't help you any--luckily eden is a GREAT napper, so that helps. good luck! i remember when eden was nursing falling asleep while nursing her...sorry i have no helpful advice, except she won't be nursing forever, if that is any consolation. :) hang in there.

Jake said...

What you really need is a good wife to take care of all that stuff for you.

Seriously though sorry about the lack of sleep. Life never seems very bright when one is overtired.

juliette pouwer said...

if she is back to eating constantly maybe start her on some cereal. Ainsley was doing that and I realized she's probably hungry. I've got some you can have. I bought the Gerber and it didn't agree with her. She's so sensitive. So I have a whole box that is needing to be used up. She seems to be okay with the Nestle brand.
I know the 'experts' say wait till 6 months but HELLO we know our kids, if she's hungry inbetween 'regular' feedings then milk just isn't enough anymore.

Jewels said...

yeah, weren't you going to start solids this week? how's that going?

a thought: pump a bottle or two, let joe take her for an afternoon if he can, and sleep away. or do it at night. whatever works, just so you can get a solid 5+ hours! gabby's doing good at night, and even then when she's fussing at 7am i'm still a grumpy momma, so i'm betting you're just frazzled right now!

give me a call if you want to get out, hit the mall or something.

DeeMomof6 said...

I understand how you feel. I haven't had many nights in the past 7 years (since Sam cam along and he was a night owl while Ben and Josh were Morning kids) where I have had more that 2-3 hours of sleep at night and hardly any of those are all at the same time. The days that I do get more it seems like a dream, but to be honest you just get use to it. I am hoping for you that things calm down and you get your rest. Good Luck and hey if by the family reunion the kids are still awake at night I'll take a turn staying up with them so you can get some sleep.