Bear with me

Finally I have an official blog that will get updated more than once every 2 years ( Joe tried to create a blog but it wasn't quite working out) I wanted a space just for me to get my thoughts out. You have been forewarned.

This is mostly pregnancy related but since that IS my life right now-it's what I'm usually thinking about. I'm now 25 weeks pregnant and just this week I've started to feel big. Like REALLY big-although evidently my uterus IS the size of a soccer ball at this point. And I'm not used to feeling big-I'm usually a pretty average size although I was 20 lbs heavier in college. It's especially noticeable when I put on my Lululemon workout pants (they don't make a maternity line as everything stretches-supposedly). You kind of look in the mirror and think-what's the point of going to the gym-I'm only going to get BIGGER the next 15 weeks! But after my weekly Biggest Loser TV addiction I went to my class Wednesday morning and felt pretty good but really tired after. Every week I watch Biggest Loser while eating junk food and it makes me want to workout. LOL. I'm not joking-it's my worst habit-snacking while watching TV. Well, maybe not my worst habit. That's why I workout-so I can eat whatever I want-because I will anyway so I try to balance it out. I am glad I haven't gained as much weight with this pregnancy as I did with Josh. I gained 35 lbs with him and only went to 33 weeks. Yikes. Only 18 lbs so far-I'm not quite sure why I haven't gained as much-it's not that I'm really doing anything different....other than running after Josh. Ahhhhhhhhh. Speaking of Josh-this picture is him at 3 months old (Aug '04)and it's one of my all time favorites. It makes me excited to meet this next little one.

I've enjoyed being pregnant much more this time than last. I've become really ZEN and that's a new thing for me. I don't know if it's because I've done this before therefore the puking breakfast up while in the middle of it doesn't phase me as much or if it's because of where I am in my life. I was on an emotional roller coaster with my first pregnancy-always mad or sad. Once you have a child you realize that the word "control" doesn't mean what it used to. I have let go of a lot. I like that saying "it is what it is". And I try to avoid the word should. Yeah-lots of things SHOULD go a certain way. But they usually just don't. Accept and move on. I've also been in a purging frenzy-anything that we're not using I don't want sitting around cluttering up my space (which will shock those of you that have ever been in my house as I usually hoard things). I don't think that technically qualifies as nesting but I've never felt this way so I'm not quite sure what to call it. I just want everything in it's place because I know once this baby comes if something hasn't had a place-it'll never get one. Maybe it's just common sense~LOL. Maybe I AM starting to work smarter not harder. Wouldn't that be a novel concept.

One last note. I want to thank those of you who have been a constant support to me over the past few years. You know who you are and I couldn't have made it through without your advice and love.